"Keep Your Gift Wrapped": Lessons Learned from Teeth

* It's never a good idea to play "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours" with the little girl who lives near a nuclear power plant.

* Beware the seemingly sweet boy in your Teen Abstinence group.

* Ditto for the seemingly kind hearted nerd that you loose your virginity to.

* If your step brother is pierced and obnoxious, he's worthless.

* Your dog, no matter how faithful he's been to you, will probably eat your penis if it falls off of you and lands on the floor.

* Director, Mitchell Lichtenstein obviously watched John Waters' "Desperate Living", and took notes!

* Straight guys, never piss off the nice girl you're having sex with ... you'll live to regret this, trust me.

* Some gynecologists are kind of slimy.

* Vagina dentata is not to be fucked with!

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