Why The House of the Devil is such a Great Horror Movie...

*Because any film that starts with one of those "based on true unexplained events" claims is always a lot of fun.

*Because as soon as the action starts, it's clear that The House of the Devil is not going to be another lame-ass, shaky cam, style-over-substance, piece of crap that passes for horror these days.

* Because the opening credits are decidedly, low tech and just plain awesome!

*Again, I love these opening credits; the freeze frames, the tacky Cars-like opening music - genius, sez I.

* Because any film that would feature Dee Wallace Stone, (and not kill her off - yes, I'm looking at you Rob Zombie), is aces in my book!

* Because The House of the Devil is available on PPV BEFORE it's released theatrically, and that's a great idea. How nice to see a new movie and not be surrounded by a a bunch of ill bred folk who lack the social skills one might expect from a group of fifth graders (yes, I'm looking at you Inglourious Basterds audience at the Marlton AMC from a few weeks ago).

* Because someone posted this picture of the odd looking fellow and his missing cat on a bulletin board, and that picture made me laugh out loud! I am very fond of sight gags.

* Because Greta Gerwig, who I loved so much in Baghead, is in this movie, and she looks just like Helen Slater.


*Because the film oh so slowly moves, at a snails' pace, some might claim, leisurely setting us up for the first real shock - which comes out of no where, and makes the viewer jump out of his or her skin.

*Because Mary Woronov is in this movie, and as soon as she shows up, you know that deviltry is a-foot! Oh what a world this would be if Mary Woronov was in every movie. One of the last surviving "Warhol Superstars", and the star of such B-classics as Death Race 2000, Eating Raoul, and Rock and Roll High school, Woronov is just perfect in The House of the Devil as the creepy Mrs. Ulman.

*Because Jocelin Donahue is perfect as the heroine, Samantha Hughes. It seems that she's channeling Karen Allen and Jamie Lee Curtis. Seriously, Donahue is one terrific actress; believable, sympathetic, and made of great "Final Girl" stuff.

* Because all that hair in the bathtub really is creepy!

* Because by the time that scary hag shows up, you'll be screaming for your mommy!

And finally, because The House of the Devil uses elements from everything from Psycho, Halloween, The Burning and Rosemary's Baby, it's a veritable love letter to horror film fans.

Director Ti West, is a flippin' genius! Trust me. once you see The House of the Devil, you'll be writing him love letters in return!

COMING SOON: I Check out The House of the Devil

...and find Mary Woronov waiting

MOVIE POSTER MADNESS: Joan Crawford Edition

Don't fuck with her, fellas!!

Say what you will about Joan Crawford, the woman had a work ethic that would leave today's pampered little movie stars running for the door claiming "exhaustion".

Joan's entry into Grande Dame Guignol began when she appeared with fellow former A-lister, Bette Davis in the Psycho Biddy extravaganza, Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? From there, Joan hitched her somewhat pickled wagon to producer, William Castle and churned out a few more films with him (including my personal fave, Strait-Jacket)

This is it, Joan's last "great" film. Over the top, and more fun than a closet full of wire hangers!

Exactly what is "uxoricide"?

AKA, Joan's carnival of horrors!

Finally, well, the less said about Trog, the better.

For the Halloween Season: NOSFERATU IN 8 MINUTES & 7 SECONDS!

ADD is no longer a reason not to enjoy this silent horror classic!

For the Upcoming Halloween Season: THE TRUTH ABOUT CANDY CORN!

Halloween is a mere thirty days from today, and while that means all your fave horror bloggers will be falling all over themselves cooking up posts about favorite monsters, movies, screams and scares, I'd like to ring in the season by paying homage to that confectionery delight that is highlighted this time of the year: Candy Corn...read on and learn.

Anyone who does not like candy corn, can not be trusted! -- Pax Romano


While some sources claim that candy corn was invented by George Renninger sometime in the 1800's; the true aficionado of this confectionery delicacy understands that it has been around since the dawn of time. Even the bible makes mention of it:

From the book of Genesis 002:666 -- And God said, "Let us now make the most fabulous foodstuff , and let us make it in shades of white and orange and yellow, and let us fill it with such sugary goodness it will make men's eyes roll back in their heads, and let us call it Candy Corn". And god made the candy corn, and saw that it was good.


Most of you know the important role that Candy Corn has played in history; the ancient Aztecs used it to trade for goods... the Greeks built several temples out of candy corn... the Romans paid their most prized servants with it who in turn used it to buy their freedom ... the Great Candy Corn Crusade was of course one of the most brutal battles of the middle ages ...and, of course, every school child remembers the story of the Cleveland Candy Corn Party.

During World War II, Candy Corn was in such demand by our troops in The Pacific, special operatives delivered the goodie in dangerous midnight runs -- maybe you read the book about these brave men, The Corn Runners, that was made into an Oscar winning film that starred Clark Gable and Betty Grable.

To truly understand what makes the tri-colored taste treat so special, one only need know the secret ingredients: see chart below

Fun Candy Corn Facts:

* Recently, the USDA has added Candy Corn to its food pyramid.

* Studies have shown that children who get at least three, six ounce, servings of Candy Corn daily, grow up to be well-adjusted, and do better in school than children who abstain from Candy Corn.

* Albert Einstein ate six bags of Candy Corn every day of his life!

* One kernel of Candy Corn has as much protein as a 15 ounce steak!

* During the month of October, some Catholic Churches replace the Communion bread with a special Host shaped piece of Candy Corn.


Finally, if you want to drink your daily dose of Candy Corn: try a Candy Corn Margarita!

MOVIE POSTER MADNESS: B-Movie Palooza!

Robot Monster: every seen this one? Make's Plan 9 From Outer Space look like Citizen Kane.

Gotta love those "thrill-crazed space teens".

OK, Zsa Zsa Gabor and Don Ameche are in this one; do you need anymore reasons to see Picture Mommy Dead?

If Hedda Hopper loved this movie, then so do I. OK, show of hands, how many of you have no idea who Hedda Hopper was? Come on, be truthful.

Actually, this is my fave of Ed's movies, it's actually pretty good (considering that Wood directed it).

And finally, The Brain That Wouldn't Die. God-almighty, this freakish film blew my mind when I watched it as a kid. Seeing Virginia Leith's noggin on that cookie tray while the creepy monster in the closet yanks off the mad doctor's arm pretty much ruined me.

More of the Best Bare Chests in Horror: Horror Movie Hunks II

Everyone knows that horror films are overflowing with comely lasses and their heaving bosoms. Women in flimsy night gowns running through the mist, taking showers at out-of-the-way motels, or maybe just showing up naked because, well, let's face it, sex sells! If you are a straight male, your needs have more than been met in scare cinema.

But what about the rest of us? Gay men, straight women? What about our needs?

Glad you asked. Submitted for your approval, here are more bare chested Horror Movie Hunks to ogle, Gentlemen, remove your shirts!

***

Let's start today's meal with something light, a buffet of boyish buffness...and for that we must turn to the men of The Covenant. Clearly, director Renny Harlin had been spending a lot of time watching the films of David DeCoteau as The Covenant is filled with sinewy, sexy twenty-somethings passing as teen high school students who spend an inordinate amount of time shirtless. No complaints about that, but as for the movie itself, well, it was pretty damn awful (some nonsense about this group of pretty boys will all become witches at the stroke of midnight on their 18th birthdays, or something like that). I really was not paying much attention to the plot, I was just waiting for another gratuitous skin shot.

***That's mega hunk, Ty Hardin as Frank Hawkins with some drag queen Joan Crawford in the film, Berserk. Frank is a tight rope walker in Joan's circus of death and he's also her boy toy. Considering that he had to play against the butchiness that was Crawford as Monica, as well as Diana Dors' rack, he did a great job. Oh, and he takes his shirt off whenever he gets a chance.

***Finally, who ordered this plate of beefcake in a fuzzy loin cloth? Oh, that's right, I did. He is Maxus (played by one of Mae West's fave body builder's Reg Lewis), the wandering warrior of Fire Monsters Against the Son of Hercules (aka Maciste contro i mostri ) who saves the king of some land from a tacky looking sea monster, and then spends the rest of the movie making out with local bimbos and flexing his muscles whilst waiting for the next beastie to emerge - all in all, not a bad gig.***