2/28/09

Steve Hammond in Miracle Mile

Arbogast has a great review of the overlooked and, mostly forgotten, 1988 film, Miracle Mile. You must really go read it HERE.

For years I've been telling people what a great film it is, and THEN I tell them to watch closely for a cameo appearance towards film's end of gay porn star, Steve Hammond. I finally found a rather grainy still to prove my point (below) of Mr. Hammond (on the right) with Miracle Mile's star, Anthony Edwards.

Below that still you can find the poster for another of Mr. Hammond's films.

2/24/09

Where Have You Gone, Marty?

Hey look, it's Marty, the ghost hunter with a big appetite! Man, he had it going on!

You'd have thunk that Marty would have beat a hasty retreat when something tried to take a bite out of him on the second floor of the Freeling's house.
Ah, but turnabout is fair play, so Marty stuck around and raided the Freeling's refrigerator ... chomping on some of Diane's fine fried chicken - and all was well until the steak started crawling across the counter... ...and then began decomposing ... yuck.
Why that's enough to send a guy to the laundry room to puke ... but wait what's this? Marty, you might need some Clearasil, buddy.

Where have you gone, Marty?

2/23/09

So What Are You Waiting For??


I did it, so can you. Get your ass over to Rondoaward.com and vote for your fave horror related movie, blog, magazine article, action figure, and a whole lot more.

2/18/09

Awards Season

It's awards season, children!

Soon Oscar will be dusted off and trotted out ... size zero starlets are all on the Tic-Tac-and-Marlboro-diet to fit in to that latest frock so that some empty headed star fucker / interviewer can comment on how "amazing" they look ...

Can you feel the excitement?

I can.

As a matter of fact it's no different here in Blogland.

A courier arrived at my villa this afternoon with word that my little horror blog was bestowed the prestigious, Premio Dardo Award by none other than that fabulous blogger, author and all around Renaissance man, Vince Liaguno (the proprietor of the equally fabulous, Slasher Speak). Vince had these kind words to say about Billy Loves Stu:

More queer musings, this time from pal Pax Romano, who explores the more homoerotic subtext in horror films with a marvelously campy sense of humor and the queerest eye this side of Fire Island.


The Premio Dardo Award is a nifty sort of meme thingy, in that the recipient of the award must then bestow the same upon five other bloggers - happily, Vince found my little attempt at blogging a worthy one; it is indeed a delight to be recognized by ones peers.

Of course it now falls to me to pay it forward, so here goes.

  • The Land of Cerpts and Honey is the blog of my pal, Cerpts. My god but this guy is a never ending font of wisdom when it come to film trivia. "Wicked as fresh red paint and poisonous as dried spiders" . Go now and soak in some of the goodness!
  • Kill Everybody in the Whole Wide World is a deranged blog that is more fun than a bowl of steaming haggis on a cold night in Edinburgh. Stop on over and say howdy to The Dreaded Rhubarb.
  • The Life of Pinky Bear is a blog by that I have been reading since forever. Maintained by The Divine Miss Jimmi, this blog has everything from make-up tips, to politics; from tales of theatrical mayhem, to tales of domestic bliss ... stop on over and say hi to The Divine One!
  • Gloomy Sunday is a blog, that, sadly, is no longer with us, but I wanted to make mention of Absinthe's wonderful postings on Gothic dime store novels. Hopefully, she will return to us soon.
  • Killer Kittens From Beyond the Grave has to be one of the sexiest, horrific, rocking and rolling blogs in the friggin' world. Go visit that kitten with a whip, Kitty LeClaw, but be warned ... this is no place for the faint of heart!
And now if you still have not had enough with all of this awards crap ... well, hold on to your 'nads, because next up, B-Sol at The Vault of Horrors is hosting the 2008 Cyber Horror Awards (LINK HERE). I can't wait to see what kind crap the "horror elite" stir up this time!

That's all for now, I think I have to go rescue Hugh Jackman from a certain fellow blogger ... night all.

2/16/09

Psych Hits It Out of the Park (or the camp)

While many of you were suffering through the Friday the 13th remake, some of us found a much better alternative on, of all places, the USA Network's program, Psych.

Last Friday night's episode, entitled Tuesday the 17th was a brilliant, homage to the Friday films (specifically part-II - entire scenes from that film are re-staged) as well as April Fools Day.

If you get a chance to see this episode in reruns, by all means watch it! From the spot-on opening credits, to the Rick Astley pinata ; this is one fun hour of TV, and it's obvious that the writers have much more affection for these films than anyone over at Platinum Dunes.

2/13/09

13 Fresh Slabs of Meat: The Dead Hunks of Crystal Lake

OK, alright, today is the day that Michael Bay and company release their reboot of Friday the 13th on an unsuspecting world ... blah, blah, blah it's going to make a gazillion dollars and that's that (oh and sex-on-a-stick, Jared Padalecki will be in it, so there's that).

Call me a purist, I liked the old Fridays, in fact I loved the first two films ... you know when it was Mrs. Voorhees knocking off kids, and then her hillbilly sack-head son doing the same (though of course, it begs the question, if Jason was actually alive, why in the hell did his own mother think he was dead??) But I digress.

Presented for your Friday the 13th reading and ogling pleasure, let's take a look at some of the more hunky victims who fell a foul of Mrs. V or her son ...First up is the tight-blue-Speedo-wearing, Jack (played by Kevin Bacon). Jack was a lanky, leggy lad who loved his weed, his girlfriend and showing off his package in the a fore mentioned Speedo's. Of course Jack's use of illicit drugs and his canoodling led to his demise via an arrow in the neck from under his bed thanks to the resourceful Pamela Voorhees.
Next up is my personal fave: Jeff (Bill Randolph), the hunky, shaggy haired, cocky bastard who was fond of wearing paper boy delivery hats, and wife-beater shirts (to show off his arms) ... he met his end via a spear that impaled both he and his girlfriend whilst they are having it off in Friday the 13th II.

Look it's Andy, Randy Andy from Friday the 13th-3D. Played by Jeffery Rodgers, Andy had the hair, the pout and the body that led me to believe he was actually on loan from Falcon Studios. Boy Howdy, but this kid was one athletic camp counselor ... of course it did him no good as he was sliced in half via a machete while walking on his hands.Hey Dougie! Wait a second, looks a lot like Matthew Star. Played by pretty-boy, Peter Barton, hunky Doug met his end when Jason, no doubt sick of Doug constantly checking his look in the mirror, crushed his noggin with his bare hands in Friday the 13th, The Final Chapter. Splat, what an exit! Cort! Dude! Played by John Travolta's nephew, Tom Fridely, Cort was your quintessential 80's party-boy. With his skin tight torn jeans, his to-die-for-eyes and his love of sex, our pretty boy was doomed from the get go. When he died from a hunting knife to the head, Cort discovered, posthumously, that Jason Lives! Poor pretty Ben (who in my humble opinion had the finest bum of any actor in any of the Friday films), played by Craig Thomas met his doom in Friday the 13th - The New Blood (aka Carrie meets Jason) in much the same manner that Doug met his; his head was crushed by Jason's hands. Oh well, we'll always have memories of his sweet bubble butt to soothe us. Remember Julius? The tough mother-fucker who challenged Jason to some mano a mano fist-a-cuffs on a rooftop in downtown Vancouver Manhattan. Played by V.C. Dupree, Julius was a pugilist with a mean right hook, but it was no match for Jason, who ends up knocking Julius head off in Jason Takes ManhattanOfficer Randy, the curly topped cutie played by Kipp Marcus, not only is possessed by the soul of Jason Voorhees, he later ends up being done in by a machete through the neck for his troubles in Jason Goes to Hell.Yes, he's rather androgynous looking, but Jim (Todd Shaffer) was a randy lad who met his end via a spear gun in Jason Takes Manhattan, I've always had a soft spot for this stoner dude, he deserved better. Oh Teddy you're so fine, you blow my mind, hey Teddy ... Played by Lawrence Monsoon, Teddy was my kind of punk. Foul mouthed, tough as nails and probably easily had for a six pack of beer and a nickel bag. Teddy died one of the more cinematic deaths in the series; he's standing in front of a movie screen that is showing silent films and is knifed from behind the screen in The Final Chapter.OK, this is Stoney (played by Yani Gellman), he was in Jason X, and I don't remember how he died, but ain't he purdy????Don't mess with Bill (Harry Crosby), he might have been the son of a famous crooner, but Bill was handy with a knife in the original Friday (remember when he chopped up that snake?) he also knew how to fix a funky generator ... alas, he was no match for Mrs. Voorhees archery skills.
And last but not least, this guy. I am not sure which Friday he was in, but he looks like some guy I used to date, so he's here.

2/11/09

Philadelphia: The City That Bites You Back

The Plays and Players Theater in Philadelphia is celebrating Zombiedelphia Month (02.13.08 through 03.13.08) with a host of flesh eating fun including a presentation of William Shakespeare's Land of the Dead.

From the Plays and Players website: William Shakespeare fights zombies. Need we say more? A true and accurate account of the 1599 zombie plague that spread to the Globe Playhouse, William Shakespeare’s Land of the Dead mixes humorous horror conventions with meticulously researched characters and events from Shakespeare’s life. A joyous experience for Shakespeare lovers and zombie fans alike, LOTD mixes genres with a knowing wink. To eat or not to eat brains… that is the question!

This sounds like a lot of fun, and for those of you who need a historical perspective, well, watch this:



For more information CLICK HERE.

2/6/09

Nick & Katherine & Chad & Michelle : BAGHEAD

From its poster's homage to that swinging 60's romp, Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice, to its Blair Witch Project meets Body Double by way of Friday the 13th story; Baghead is one beguiling and entertaining film.

Four out of work actors hole up in cabin in the woods to cook up a script for a film that will feature all of them. A lot of drinking, flirting and navel gazing ensues until one night, Michelle (played by the perky Greta Gerwig) has a dream about a somewhat menacing man in the woods wearing a bag on his head. The nightmare serves as an inspiration to the foursome's alpha-actor, Nick (the delectable Ross Partridge) and an idea is born: four people in a cabin in the woods terrorized by a mad man wearing a bag over his head.

For awhile, the secluded thespians continue flirting with each other, drinking and pretty much next to nothing happens.

And then, one night, Michelle invites Nick to her room. Later on when someone does show up in her room (and it's clear that it's not Nick) Baghead begins to morph from a talky indie-drama into a creepy suspense flick, faster than you can say "The Unknown Comic".

Who is the weirdo stalking the gang? Is it one of the troupe playing tricks on the others, or is it actually a Jason Voorhees-wanna-be?

Speaking of Jason, Baghead has one ingenious scene that parodies every Friday the 13th kill set up ... you know how the doomed of Crystal Lake tend to mostly meet their demise either just before, during or after some kind of carnal indiscretion? Well, in Baghead, it's not even safe to masturbate!

Whatever you do, don't sit down to watch Baghead expecting some kind of slice and dice horror film as you will be sorely disappointed. However, if you watch with an open mind, you might find yourself delighted and, surprisingly, spooked.