2010: The Year I Brought Down Horror Blips, and Other Stuff...

2010 is almost a wrap, and here at BLS International it was an historical and rewarding year.

Probably one of the biggest thrills was the fact that for several weeks last Summer, BLS was The Number One Blog according to Horror Blips; but joy soon turned to sadness when, without any warning, Horror Blips vanished from the web.  While I don't know what happened, I like to think that I somehow had something to do with its untimely death.

Whatever the case, it's always nice to go out on top.

This was also the year that I rolled out the Union of Independent Horror Bloggers.

Inspired from postings by both B-Sol and Iloz Zoc, I felt it was time to put the money where the mouth is (so to speak), and set up some guidelines for those who are writing about horror in popular media.  Did it work?  I can't really say, but quite a few folks jumped on the bandwagon at the time.

April 1st saw the release of the most talked about horror film of the year, Manic Monday.

Needless to say, director Dex Baxter's mind-fuck of a film put the horror blogosphere into a tizzy as witnessed by the rave reviews that you can find HERE.

Unfortunately, due to legal disputes and some rather unsavory goings on, Baxter's film was pulled from distribution the very next day and has yet to go into wide release.

Last June, TMZ reported that the producers of Manic Monday, rounded up every print and had them destroyed amongst rumors of diabolical disturbances and the untimely deaths of the film's lead actors shortly after the film was completed.

Gay Pride Month was celebrated in style at BLS with terrific guest postings, rundowns of horror films every gay man should see, horror actors who have turned to porn, dead hunks, letters from camp, suburban witches of the 60's, Lauren Bacall croaking her way thorough a Broadway-based slasher film, Joan Crawford chewing the scenery, and the truth behind Peter and Roger's relationship in Dawn of the Dead.

In late July of this past year, I loosed upon the interwebs, The First Ever Billy Loves Stu Meme for Horror Bloggers,  and the response was overwhelming!  In fact we even had some non-horror bloggers join in on the fun.


Click Here to take a look at some of the fine folks who decided to take part in this little experiment.

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All in all it's been a pretty good year - and every day, I count my blessings to be among such talented and twisted company (I'm talking about my fellow horror bloggers out there), the men and women who toil endlessly getting the word out on those things that go bump in the dark; the movies, books, plays and anything else that sends a shiver up their collective spine.   If you want to see some really good stuff, go to the right of this article and scroll on down to my list of favorite blogs (The Children of the Night), there you will find like-minded friends and fiends who will delight you, no doubt, with their wit, wisdom and way with words.

Grande Dame Guignol: Ruby Deagle

Name: Ruby Deagle


Location: Kingston Falls (somewhere in New England, or maybe the mid-west).

Modus Operandi: Mean spirited harpy ... skin flint... probably the love child of Mr. Potter and Miss Gulch as she's wealthy and greedy, as well as prone to threatening to kill dogs...though Scrooge-like in her relationship with Christmas, she does own an "imported Bavarian Snowman"... enjoys taunting the less fortunate and mocking their requests for a little more time to pay the rent or mortgage...something of a drama queen when confronted, she claims she has a "weak heart" and will feign chest pains or fainting...probably owns most of  downtown  Kingston Falls...only seems to like money and cats (both of which she seemingly has a lot of)...smells like mothballs and expensive perfume.

Camp Factor: Delighfully wicked! A combination of several on-screen villains rolled into one nasty old hag, Mrs. Deagle was the kind of woman you loved to hate.  And when she's done in by a group of Christmas caroler gremlins by way of a jet propelled stair lift, it was pure over-the-top-camp-heaven!

mrs deagle about to meet her reward...

...thanks to these guys...

...we've got lift off!

Played by: Polly Holiday

How Can I Ignore The Boy Next Door: PERVERSION

Actor, writer, director, Chris Moore's  Perversion is an independent horror film that is both an homage as well as a re-imagining of the slasher genre, and a Hitchcock thriller, and a 70's Grindhouse feature with just a little bit of John Water's style gross out thrown in for good measure.


Ryan McNamara (Moore) is a survivor of a horrific incident that occurred to his family several years earlier.  These days he prefers the confines of his suburban home where he lives with an older brother, (Jack McCafferty).  Suffering from post-traumatic-syndrome, Ryan seems a rather tortured soul, and is constantly taking showers (which brings to mind that other celebrated tortured cinematic figure, Marion Crane of Psycho).  To add to his problems, it seems that his neighbor is a creep with a penchant for high-school aged boys.  If all this is not enough, strange phone calls taunt our hero as well as three masked stalkers who may, or may not, have been involved in the traumatic events earlier in Ryan's life.

Obviously shot on a shoe-string budget, Perversion has the feel of one of those early 70's horror films and that's what makes it so watchable.  Whether it was by choice or design, Perversion has such an authentic low-fi vibe to it, that were it not for the inclusion of cell phones and the clothing, one might swear that it was cobbled together sometime during the summer of 1972.

One of the more fascinating aspects of the film is how Moore manages to turn the iconic "final girl" into a "final boy".  Make no doubt, Ryan is really put upon, and he has to survive on his wits, his sex appeal, and his apparent incredibly deft use of sharp objects that will inflict the most damage on others at a moment's notice.  If the numerous shower scenes echo Psycho or Carrie, it's the moment when Ryan is trying to calm  down and he call's himself, "kid-o" that brings to mind Laurie Strode in Halloween.

 

True to form, a final boy or girl needs a BFF, and Brad Bauer ( Brad Mallette) fills the bill admirably.  With his somewhat goofy demeanor, and plain likable presence, Mallette really stands out ... I think this kid could give Jason Mewes a run for his money.  Actually the chemistry between Moore and Mallette feels real, and adds a lot to the story.  I could not help but wonder what their back-story might be.

 Now before I fall over my self praising this movie, be advised of a few things: firstly, there are a lot of technical flaws (lighting for instance - sometimes, characters faces seem to disappear and then reappear - and some times the audio seemed very muddled). Also, there are heavy homosexual overtones included, so if that sort of thing is not your cup of tea, you may want to seek out the latest piece of heterosexual approved crap playing at your multiplex;   the rest of you, come on in! 

All in all, Perversion is a promising start from  a young film maker, and despite a few flaws, has moments of fucking genius.  Furthermore, you'll either scream or laugh out loud at the final revenge scene depending on how sick your sense of humor is.  

Me?  

I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes. 

Pornography: A Thriller

Director David Kittredge's Pornography: A Thriller is a film that takes the viewer down a dark, disturbing road and then tosses him into a rabbit-hole where he finds an even darker version of Wonderland than Lewis Carroll (or David Lynch) might have ever imagined.

What starts as a cautionary tale about a former gay porn star named Mark Anton (Jared Grey), who, back in the 1990's agreed to do a private film for a secretive client, and then vanished; becomes a mystery when a present day author named Michael (Matthew Montgomery), who is researching a book on adult film stars of the past, becomes obsessed with Anton's case.   This premise alone would make for a fascinating story - but wait, there's more -   Just when you think you know what is going on, Kittredge pulls the rug out from under and delivers a third act that knocks the ball right out of the park, introducing the possibility that everything we have seen up to this point, has been nothing more than a dream...oh, and did I mention the hulking-monster-of-a-guy in the Leatherface mask brandishing a hypodermic needle? 

Not a film to be viewed casually, Pornography: A Thriller demands a lot from its audience. Owing much to such movies like, Mulholland Drive, Inland Empire, Vanilla Sky, and Eyes Wide Shut, this is a homo-erotic, psychotronic experience full of red herrings and twisted logic. It's all very beguiling and terribly fascinating. 

One can not help but consider that the filmmakers may have actually been saying something about  porn (gay or straight)  in general; the way millions watch "  dirty movies"  yet never admit to it; the way the performers are often viewed as nothing more than interchangeable slabs of meat; the way the video revolution of the mid eighties changed the game completely - no more were naked bodies watched in a communal setting, VHS changed all of that allowing the viewer to be alone with his or her object of fascination so that he or she could observe and obsess over and over.

Ultimately, Pornography: A Thriller , with it's obtuse denouement, may leave the viewer questioning what they have just seen.  A second viewing is definitely recommended.   However, don't do this thinking that you will have it all figured out, because you won't.  What you might come away with is a better understanding of what drives any of us to sit alone in the dark and watch strangers copulate - and then imagine if you could direct those strangers to do other things, maybe, unthinkable things.   Imagine what kind of monster you might turn out to be if you had that kind of  power. 

Scary, thought, ain't  it?

Horror Porn Rises Again

OK, I am gonna' give this one two thumbs up based on the poster alone...heck, it's got to be better than the film that inspired it!

 

Well, you have to admit that the poster looks legitimate.  If you didn't know better, you might think that this was an actual Friday the 13th film.  That said, why no play on words in the title?  Just the word "parody' after the title ... lame.

Here's another one.  Great poster, but no imagination in giving this Saw sex parody an original title. 

That comedy about three witches is given the X rated treatment - and no play on words in the title.  But I am gonna give 'em credit because the woman in the center does have Bette Midler-like hair.

Leave it to my gay brothers to come up with this one ... OK the title is sort of lame, but "One, Two, Freddy's Cumming in You" is genius - sick fucking genius.

 

I am going to give them an "E" for effort.

Brilliant! "I ain't afraid of no ho!"  Great poster, and Peter North (AKA Matt Ramsey) is in it!

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Check out the promo for the Friday the 13th parody, it's actually pretty entertaining!

Gingerdead: The Adventures of Nella & Nello

Submitted for your approval is a short film co-written by, co-directed by, and co-starring one of my Facebook Friends, Chris Moore.

Moore and his partner in crime, Nina Scholl have served up Gingerdead: The Adventures of Nella & Nello, a bastardized version of Hansel and Gretel that takes place a few months after the events of Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans.   This 16 minute opus has everything: love, death, blood, cookies, and even a musical number - and more than that, it's hysterically funny!  Honestly after watching this one, I  declare the following: "I have seen the future of underground cinema, and its NAMES are Chris Moore and Nina Scholl!

Now sit back and enjoy as Bruno Zipes tells us why it's dangerous to be orally fixated...

Could Have Been a Contender: Strange Behavior

1981's Strange Behavior, is probably one of the most confounding horror films I have ever seen.

A combination of slasher, science fiction, 50's teen-horror, and murder mystery; Strange Behavior tries desperately to be all things to all people - and man oh man, it stumbles horribly despite its well meaning efforts.

Directed by Michael Laughlin, and starring a mixed cast that includes Michael Murphy, Louise Fletcher, Dey Young (from Rock and Roll High School) Fiona Lewis and Charles Lane; Strange Behavior tells the tale of a mad scientist who is seeking revenge on the people of a small mid-western town (said town is played by Avondale, New Zealand) by experimenting on the teens of the town and turning them into mindless killers.  Sounds like fun, right?  And for a while it is.  In fact the first twenty minutes, or so,  of the film are very intriguing.

  After the opening credits (scored by German ambient music makers, Tangerine Dream) sets a rather David Lynch mood a murder occurs, and it's seen only in shadows...

...from this we get a further Lynch-like look at where we are.  Gorgeous landscapes of the small town in brilliant sunlight set up the location until finally we are at the house of Officer John Brady (Murphy), and his son, Pete (Don Shor), who, apparently likes to walk around bare-assed in front of his dad...BTW, this is the only nude scene in the film!

Later on, we discover that bubble butt, I mean, Pete is a college student.  And like all college students, he needs a little money - so he joins his buddy and agrees to be tested by someone at the college's science department.  Also, as a college student, Pete likes to go to themed dance parties, and that's when Strange Behavior delivers its most delightfully silly moment: a new-wave costume party...complete with a choreographed dance scene set to Lou Christie's "Lightning Strikes."

...couple number one: Dork Boy and Pat Benatar! 

 

Couple number two: The Flintstone Sisters!  

Couple number three: Robin and Screaming Gal!

Couple number 4: Lily Munster and Bat Man!

EVERYBODY DANCE WITH PIPPI LONGSTOCKING!

Like they say, it's all fun and games until someone gets hurt ... and true to form someone does get hurt...actually a couple of people are in trouble because some goober is running around in a Tor Johnson mask with a big knife hacking up party guests on the front lawn!

Turns out that we see the killer remove his mask, and it's Pete's buddy - oh no! Could it be that the experiments being run on him at the school are causing this...strange behavior (see what I did, put the title of the film in, clever, eh?).  

Later on more killings occur - seems like one of the more zaftig teens has taken to slashing , and she's very proficient at it.  She likes to chop off hands and leave them around where parents can find them...

...and if that's not enough, she comes back to the scene of the crime to finish up her hand collection...

 

...this causes Inspector Donovan (Lane) to utter the immortal line, "Round up all the fat girls!"

While I wish I could tell you that things only get better, sadly they don't.  At this point, Strange Behavior just sort of stalls out and slowly (very slowly) runs out of gas... sure, sure the mad scientist's assistant (Shaw) gets to stick an enormous hypodermic needle into bubble butt's eye...

 ...ouch, that's gotta hurt...

...and sure, Louise Fletcher is quiet good as Brady's long suffering girlfriend (honestly, she's terrific in this film)...

 

...but none of this manages to coalesce or bring things to a satisfying ending.  By the time we've reached the "shocking conclusion", and the mad scientist  is revealed it all seems rather anti-climatic.  The pregnant pauses and lingering moments of facial reactions don't seem to help matters either. 

Nah, it's all just a big old blah by the film's happy ending, and the closing credits that just seem to happen.  And that's a shame, because Strange Behavior really could have been a contender. 

That said, turn up the speakers and enjoy the jerky movements, bad costumes, and general weirdness of my favorite scene from Strange Behavior!